How can you help? – Some Don’ts
Ø Don’t respond to a bad result or mistake with punishment or criticism – give your son/daughter time to work out for themselves why things didn’t go as hoped for. If they ask your advice first compliment them for something he or she did right then give advice emphasising the positive results, and maybe suggest that they talk to their coach who will give them guidance, if they have not already.
Ø Don’t turn a blind eye to any bad behaviour, cheating or bad manners by your son/daughter. In such instances reasonably prompt action is required. To do otherwise will infer that you condone such behaviour or at least do not consider personal standards and respect of people and rules important in sport.
Ø Don’t forget that your child is still growing – training which may be appropriate for an adult e.g.( heavy weight training) can have adverse long-term effects on growth and development of a young child.
Ø Don’t ignore persistent aches and pains – children are often reticent to admit to injuries especially if it means missing training or a competition so listen out for persistent grumbles. Talk to the coach and if aches exist more than a few days then seek professional advice. Pain is not an ache; it is usually the sign of an injury, see a GP or a physiotherapist.
Ø Don’t ignore other children in the family – sometimes brothers and sisters may feel left out or bored as the household revolves around the needs of the young swimmer. It is important to try and keep a balance between swimming and the interests of the other members of the family.
Ø Don’t allow the situation to develop where your child is frightened of losing because of the way you respond – a fear of failure can often result in children feigning injury and not entering or withdrawing from competitions.
Ø Don’t force a young child to specialise entirely on swimming – children should be allowed to develop other preferences.
Ø Don’t attend every training session and competition – it is important for your child’s future development in sport that they are trusted to make correct decisions during either training or competition. This is the first stage in the development of self-motivation and self-reliance. Constant parental supervision can result in the swimmer becoming emotionally, and other wise over dependent on your presence and advice.
Ø Don’t say ‘we’ won or ‘we’ lost – It is important that you don’t become over-involved in your child’s swimming. Remember it is your child who is participating – you are there to support and encourage, not compete.